by Madison Caylor
At one point we were all carried in not only one, but two wombs. When our grandmothers were pregnant our future selves were held in our unborn mother. We were carried in our mother’s womb space before she was even born. In a way, everything our grandmothers and mothers went through has made an impact on us. This can contribute to what’s known as ancestral trauma. While I’m no expert I can definitely say all of us have these hidden traumas in varying levels of intensity and can follow maternal lines back for hundreds of years if the wounds were never mended.
This year has been heavy with emotion. I’ve felt worried, angry, frustrated, abandoned, overwhelmed, and heartbroken. As I work with women and their fertility I can’t help but think about
Photo credit by James Wheeler on unsplash
my own fertility journey. Somedays I’m brave. I’m ready to buckle down and do the hard work to bring another life into this world. Other days I’m in disbelief at the unrest in the world and wonder how I could possible create something so pure and innocent and be able to keep it safe. How can I think about having a baby when I’m as busy, tired, and drained as I am? This stress blocks creative power, and no doubt that stress can effect fertility.
Have you ever been stressed because you’re stressed!?
Take a deep breath with me.
Maybe we are feeling this way because we have felt it before through our mothers. Of course new trauma can happen but what if we took the time to heal past trauma to help future generations? Where would you even start to clear trauma and womb space? Here are some healing techniques that I would start with:
-Instilling body positivity in our young people. Teach children the correct names for body parts. Teach them what real bodies look like. This will improve self confidence and keep them more safe against sexual assault.
-Teaching young women how to chart the four phases of their cycles. Fertility is so important for every woman and is much more than getting pregnant. Fertility is reproductive health and autonomy, it is the well-being of our reproductive systems. Ancient traditions brought groups of young women together with rites of passage to learn about their cycles, healing, and motherhood. Though this is a seemingly forgotten knowledge in our society today, it is not lost and many fertility awareness educators are available today.
-Find a practitioner who will listen to you and help you correct PMS, cramping, mood swings, etc. Over 200,000 diagnosis of endometriosis alone occur every year and many more are undiagnosed. If a medical practitioner is dismissive of your pain and infertility its time to find a new one. You’ll also be very surprised at how much a chiropractor, acupuncturist, herbalist, or other alternative therapist knows about women’s health too.
-Take care of your mental and emotional health. For me, seeing a therapist is like going to the emotional spa (and so much more). Break mental health stigmas!
-Get toxins out of your body, keep good nutrients in. These are small changes you can make everyday. Make a few changes to your diet with a focus on adding nutrition in rather than stressing on what you take out. Let your food be your medicine. When you can get this figured out then change your body care, makeup, and household products.
-Get support! This could be a support group, fertility coach, health coach, doula, or other therapist or practitioner.
-Keep talking and support others through their journey in letting trauma go and healing their womb.
I can’t change society and the messes that it will always carry by myself. However, I can help and heal myself. I can help women around me who reach out. I can conceive a child in a loving and healing environment. I can teach and raise a child to let go of new trauma and new heartache when the world is bogged down by too much. And maybe one day this future generation will have a changed society because they no longer have to hold their mother’s trauma. Its something we all should hope and try for.
Madison Caylor is a certified H.E.R.B.A.L Birthkeeper and Holistic Doula, Placenta Specialist, and Peer Lactation Counselor serving Knoxville, TN and surrounding areas.
Ladys Mantle Herb & Birth
Herbal Birthwork & Holistic Wellness for the journey through motherhood.